bugs—the uninvited guests in your code that show up at the worst possible time. And when they do, you *must* defend your honor with the most creative, ridiculous excuses imaginable. Here are some of the *worst* (but most amusing) justifications for why your code is misbehaving: ### <br>**1. "It Worked on My Machine!"** The classic. The golden standard. The ultimate deflection. If it ran once on your laptop while the planets aligned, that should be enough, right? Who cares about production environments, dependencies, or the fact that your "machine" is a 2008 potato running an ancient version of Node.js? ### <br>**2. "The Compiler/Interpreter Clearly Hates Me."** It’s not *your* fault—the tools have a personal vendetta against you. That `NullPointerException`? Malicious sabotage. That infinite loop? The interpreter is just being dramatic. ### <br>**3. "I Was Following Best Practices… From 1995."** Why use modern frameworks when you can write everything in raw assembly? That memory leak isn’t a bug—it’s a *retro feature*. ### <br>**4. "The Documentation Lied to Me."** You read *one* outdated Stack Overflow answer from 2012 and based your entire implementation on it. Now the API behaves differently? *Betrayal.* ### <br>**5. "It’s Not a Bug, It’s an Undocumented Feature."** Users *love* surprises, right? That random crash at 3 AM? Just your code’s way of encouraging healthy sleep habits. ### <br>**6. "The Tests Passed!"** You wrote exactly *one* test that checks if `true == true`, and since CI gave you a green checkmark, you declared victory. What do you mean "edge cases"? ### <br>**7. "I Blame the Intern."** Even if you *are* the intern. Even if there *is no intern.* The mere suggestion that someone else *might* have touched the code is enough to shift blame. ### <br>**8. "The Cosmic Rays Did It."** Bit flips happen, man. Quantum mechanics is wild. Your `if` statement inverted itself because the universe *willed* it. ### <br>**9. "I Was in the Zone™."** You coded for 14 hours straight, fueled by caffeine and questionable life choices. Of *course* you forgot to handle that error—you were *artistic* at the time. ### <br>**10. "It’s a Heisenbug—It Disappears When You Look at It."** The moment you open DevTools, the bug vanishes. Clearly, it’s shy. Not your problem anymore. ### <br>**11. "The User Shouldn’t Have Done That."** Oh, they clicked the button *twice*? Who could have predicted such reckless behavior? ### <br>**12. "I Was Just Following the Business Requirements!"** *(Checks notes)* *"Make it work, but also make it fast, but also make it perfect, but also don’t spend time on it."* Yeah, this bug was *inevitable.* ### <br>**13. "It’s a Feature for Security."** If the app crashes when someone tries to hack it, that’s just *defensive programming.* ### <br>**14. "The Deadline Made Me Do It."** "We needed it shipped yesterday, so I *had* to skip error handling. Priorities!" ### <br>**15. "I’ll Fix It in the Next Commit."** *(Spoiler: You won’t.)* --- At the end of the day, bugs happen to the best of us. The real skill isn’t writing perfect code—it’s *justifying* the imperfect one with a straight face. 😆